Today I decided to give this a try. I have no idea why or if anyone will read this, but every now and then I have something I would like to say and apparently this can be a healthy way to go about sharing these thoughts and experiences. I am hesitant as the past five years in the finance industry have made me ultra paranoid regarding internet activity. I am also quite sure I will be guarded here as well for I am about to pursue a new career (career number three I might add) teaching high school English.
I would like to believe that a person can be forthcoming with thoughts and feelings and experiences without being offensive. Here goes...
This morning I am sipping coffee and feeling the lovely Huntington Beach morning breeze from which I gratefully praise the June marine layer - otherwise known as "June Gloom". As I sit here I am serenaded by the sound of happy Labradors chewing rawhide. Suddenly the familiar smell of "silent but deadly" fills the air and I am brought back to reality.
I am trying to take advantage of these last few days before grad school begins. I am trying to make lists, create some sort of a schedule, be disciplined, clean house, get to the gym, plan a wedding - you know, be perfect... but... sometimes, now more than ever, as August fast approaches, I want more than anything to watch bad '80's movies and read summer novels and bake banana bread. Rather than take the puppies on a nice walk - I want to lay with them and watch and smile as they soak up the attention. I know that my days of lazy home time are numbered and I struggle to find a guilt free way of allowing my inner disciplinarian to relax and enjoy.
So, as you struggle with your day of shoulds and should nots, know that you are not alone and remind yourself to be gentle.
Now, I'm off to do the laundry, the dishes, study for the CSET, head to the gym, finalize our wedding guest list, handle last minute admissions paperwork for school and plan dinner all while watching "The Breakfast Club" and "Pretty in Pink"... or.. maybe... just that last part... ?
